Sunday, December 13, 2009

R.I.P.

I had this funny post I was going to put out today. When I was getting Calvin’s prescription filled at Target yesterday I had the following conversation with the pharmacy technician.

Me: “I need to get this prescription filled for my dog.”

Her: “Have you had this filled here before?”

Me: “No. This is the first time I’m getting a prescription at Target.”

Her: “We put bands on our bottles so you can color code them. What color would Calvin like?”

Me: (Blink, blink) “Why don’t you surprise him.”

I was going to go into whether dogs can even see in color, and blah, blah. But now what’s the point? I’ll never open that prescription bottle with the blue band the tech picked out.

Calvin started having seizures again early yesterday morning. He had a total of eight in 26 hours. This morning when both the dogs were eating in the laundry room I heard the ironing board get knocked against the wall. When I went to see what happened Calvin was in the middle of another seizure. His body was convulsing and his head? His head was banging against the concrete floor. BAM! BAM! BAM! (Stopping to wipe tears away….this is really hard.) I grabbed some folded towels that were on the dryer and was able to get them under him. After a minute or so it stopped and I used one of the towels to wipe the foam off of him and the floor. He looked at me with his brown eyes for a moment and then stood up and went back to eating his food. I stood up with my back against the wall, both literally and figuratively. I asked myself: What is going to happen when I’m at work? How badly could he hurt himself during a seizure? What are these seizures doing to his brain? What am I supposed to do…but I already knew the answer.

Losing a pet is hard. Making the decision to end your pet’s life is even harder.







Rest in Peace, Calvin.

21 comments:

Headless Mom said...

(((hugs)))

Lola said...

Oh, Linda, I'm so sorry. You did the right thing, though.

It's heartwrenching to make the decision to put your beloved animals down, but it's more humane than letting them suffer.

Hang in there.

KarraMoeller said...

Oh, Linda. :(

All I can do is offer a hug. Like you said, it's so hard losing a pet, possibly harder to make the choice to do so.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Blondefabulous said...

OMG! I am so sorry! It is so tough to do the right thing. Having lost my baby fuzzball I know the hole in your heart and the ache that doesn't quite go away. Hugs to you sweetie! Be strong!

Moonspun said...

Oh sweetheart! Big big hugs to you! I am sorry and I know you'll miss him. But you did the right thing, even if it feels really really shitty right now..
Thinking of you

LceeL said...

Oh, Linda, I am so sorry. He was a good dog.

MarieC said...

The more I think about it, the more I KNOW you made the right choice...this too shall pass

Logical Libby said...

We had a cat with seizures that we had to put down last month. It is truly a heart rending experience. I am so sorry you had to go through it. I am glad you got to have Calvin.

Mad Woman said...

Oh hun! What a shitty decision to have to make. I'm so sorry!! Big ((hugs)) for you!!

Meg61 said...

*hugs*

Organic Meatbag said...

I'm so sorry, dear... nothing breaks my heart more...

Cuz'n Carol said...

(((((((((HUGS))))))))))
I'll call you later.
Love ya!

Sheila said...

Again, I'm so sorry but just remember that he isn't going to suffer anymore.

Love you.

Aunt Juicebox said...

Ah, damn, honey. =( I was just talking to a friend about the best dog I ever had, and how she died from cancer, and I was still feeling sad about that. I've wanted another dog for a long time, but the thought of losing another animal I've loved so much has kept me from doing it.
Hugs.

Avitable said...

We had to put down a pet who was having seizures for the same reason. It's such a hard decision, but remember, all dogs go to heaven.

(Hugs)

Badass Geek said...

My heart breaks for you, Linda. You did the right thing, but that doesn't make it feel any better.

I'm so, so sorry.

Nej said...

I don't know what to say...I'm so sorry. As Badass just said, you did the right thing.

Cindy said...

Prayers and warm thoughts for you.

Cindy said...

...and I don't want it to be.

Selma said...

I am so sorry to hear this. He was a beautiful boy. It is the hardest decision in the world to make. Hope you are OK.

Rest in peace, dear Calvin. XX

Kaylen said...

This totally made me cry!! It's so sad to have to make this decision, even though you know it's best for your beloved pet, it's SO hard to say goodbye.
Calvin was adorable, and I am so sad for you. Remember the great life he had with you. It will get easier...