Friday, January 8, 2010

Jolted and Revolted...

I have had blog fodder falling out of my butt like hemorrhoids lately, and yet? Nothing. I was finally jolted off my Preparation H pad when Lou actually called me on the phone tonight to see if everything was okay; which was very soothing sweet.

Paul came home from India for the holidays; unfortunately he had jet lag for the first five days and an upset stomach for most of his ‘visit’. He left for Mumbai a/k/a Bollywood this past Monday and I’ll be meeting up with him in Delhi in two weeks. Can you say “Freak Out?”

Anyhoo-ha, here are a few tidbits I’ve learned about India:

Apparently when you send your shirts out to be cleaned they come back as if you had just bought them. By this I mean that they put the cardboard piece in the collar and tissue paper in between the fold. They also tag each sock separately, not in pairs. I meant to take a picture to show you, but I didn’t.

You only drink water out of a bottle…that you’ve either purchased from a reputable store or have seen opened in front of you; and of course no ice. You rinse after brushing your teeth with said bottled water and you do not sing in the shower.

As a Westerner, you never eat raw food and don’t expect to get beef; cows are sacred there. In fact a lot of Indians are vegetarians. They do have Subway, KFC and McDonalds, but it is sometime more expensive to eat at one of these compared to a restaurant. And if you’re wondering if they have burgers at McDonald’s, they do. They’re called veggie burgers. They do have chicken nuggets and chicken roll-ups; and served with your fries there is Chatpata Spice Mix. I haven’t tried it yet; I just need to make a stop at my local Mickey Dees.

Now if you’re looking for an after dinner mint, don’t expect a few of those soft butter mints or even the hard Starlight candies because this is what you’ll get. Both have a definite licorice flavor to them.

Right hand vs. left hand.
For all you south paws out there this could be a challenge. In India you only eat with your right hand. You only offer someone something with your right hand and you except with your right hand. Why? Well, let me tell you that the majority of people in India do not use toilet paper. What do they use you wonder. Well it would be your left hand.

Paul had to bring his own toilet paper into the office; both the women’s and men’s bathroom had none. What they did have was a five gallon bucket of water next to the commode with a ladle. Oh, and only the women’s restroom had soap. Put on your Mr. Roger’s sweater and can we say, “E. coli?” Needless to say I’m packing a six pack (of Charmin) and a crap load of hand sanitizer when I go.

Hopefully more to follow; I just need to get into the zone again…speaking of zone. Here’s a picture of the polluted ozone in Navi Mumbai.

Oh wait…more India blog fodder. Here’s the Hyundai dealership where Paul is located.


Crystal said...

Glad to see you're posting again. India seems like an interesting place, but I'm not sure I would want to visit. I totally agree with you about the Charmin and hand sanitizer.

Anonymous said...

It's going to be an education in more ways than one for you, hon. The toilet thing really is not the greatest. I hope all goes well and that you stay well. Look after yourself.

Avitable said...

Should be a fun experience. Have a blast!

Unknown said...

I assumed that you were busy with your hubby!
Wait, is that dealership for real? It sounds like you will have quite an experience!
Glad he and you are ok, though...

Unknown said...

Thus the reason this left handed person will probably never, EVER, go to India. Taj Mahal notwithstanding.

I can't find my blog said...

Have fun and stay healthy!

Did you enjoy the holidays?

Sheila said...

We need to get together again before you leave!

How is Paul adjusting to the jet lag this time around?

justsomethoughts... said...

i should save this blog entry for the ties i want to go on a brief but ferocious diet.

Badass Geek said...

Wow. Talk about culture shock, eh?

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

Wow, now THAT is going to be an adventure, hon! This was fascinating. :)

Nej said...

I'd like to visit India, and I'd not like to visit India...all at the same time.