Well, I do. I’ve been out here, making my own little
Warning to anyone offended by potty language or this
The reason that I wasn’t going to post is because my spastic colon was acting up. There, I’ve said it and now you know. I have a spastic colon, another term for IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome). It acted up at work yesterday with everyone in the office…and a co-ed restroom. Need I say more? Well, yes I must because obviously you’re still reading.
Just after lunch my stomach started talking to me, you know, just shooting the breeze. Then it asked me to dance. A Jig at first, then a Rumba-Rumba-Rumble and finally a Skip To the Loo. You catch my drift…no hopefully you don’t.
Everyone abhors an upset stomach, but having one in the workplace, is worse; especially if you are a woman surrounded by men. As a woman you can let your female co-workers know that you are experiencing a problem because they can be understanding. You cannot, however, explain to the males you work with why you have been in the restroom three times in the last half hour. Not only would you not bring it up, you are going to try to hide that fact.
Exhaust fan whirring, water running and clenched butt cheeks I go for the dunk and try to end the game as quickly as possible. Finding no air freshener under the sink, I lather my hands with soap and do a quick
Exiting the restroom and feeling flushed I decide it’s time to forfeit. Doing the walk of shame, I leave early…Game Over.